My Stance On Guns

I found out about the latest mass shooting when I was on my way to the comedy club to do a set.  Great!  Just what I needed to get me in a good mind set.  Thanks Swedie.  I said I wouldn't read up on it just yet.  I didn't want it on my mind.  I walked in and a Swedish comedian nodded to me:

       - What's up bro?  Did you hear about that shooting?  You guys and your guns, man.  It's crazy!

I just shook my head.  It was like I was representing my dumb ass country with their stubborn ass, outdated rules.  The rest of the civilized world is baffled by our stupidity.  This keeps happening and will happen again because we are a gun-crazed society that refuses to change.  The culture is dangerous and the political process is polluted.  The NRA has too much control over the conversation and we eat that shit up because it's "our right".  I hear people shouting out "SECOND AMENDMENT!" without knowing what the fuck they're talking about.  The second amendment was written in the 1700s.  There weren't automatic weapons back then.  There were muskets.  A newly created union was trying to protect its citizens against the government.  It's an outdated amendment and should not be used to justify someone legally purchasing 13 guns (as the killer did in Oregon).  13 guns!  Does anyone need 13 guns?  You have two hands...

I grew up around guns.  My mom had a gun.  I have uncles that had guns.  My grandmother shot a man.  I used to work at my family's convenience store as a kid and there was a huge gun under the counter in case of robbery.  There was also a pump shotgun in the ceiling tiles in case one needed a little more power.  I've always been comfortable around guns.  I knew the dangers.  I knew they weren't toys.  I would venture to say that the guns that my family members owned would be classified as "protect your family" guns.  I shot a few guns (9mm, .22 rifle, .45 cal) in the woods with my uncle in Pennsylvania.  A target was involved.  Maybe you could classify those as "sport"???

I never really had a strong stance on guns.  I felt it was each person's right to own a gun or not and responsibility to handle it safely.  I ALWAYS thought the "protect your family" thing was bullshit.  I even cringed when President Obama said it in his latest speech on the subject.  People do not own guns to protect their family.  I know ZERO people that had a home invasion occur and then had to stop the bad guys with their trusty gun that Dad had in the safe.  That shit is in the movies.  In real life - more often than the movie thing - the scenario ends with a kid playing with the gun and shooting him/herself or someone else by accident. When a middle class person living in the suburbs buys a gun, that person is doing it to have a toy or a trophy.  A dangerous toy/trophy.  NEWS FLASH:  Nobody is trying to hurt your family.  Get over yourself.  You're bringing more danger to your family than any "bad guy" by keeping your dangerous toy around.

The most recent mass shooting in America frustrated me to the point that I took a stance.  I'm anti-gun now.  Yeah, I said it!  Owning a gun should be illegal or damn near illegal.  Hunters should be able to own HUNTING rifles and that's it.  Training and psychological evaluations should be required for ANYONE that is permitted to purchase a gun and it should be a 6 month process.  And after that process, the person should be able to have ONE gun.  And it should be SUPER expensive.  You really want your dangerous toy?  You're going to really pay for it.  We'll see how bad you want to "protect your family" then.  There are more things that can be done.  There are people that are smarter than me that can come up with something.  But something needs to be done.  It's sad that NOTHING has happened.  It's just a matter of time before another mass killing happens.  I thought for sure something would happen after those little kids were killed at Sandy Hook.  Little innocent children were slaughtered and people chose to defend their stupid toys?  What's wrong with us?

I've heard the dumb ass argument that "if you take the guns away then there will be more stabbings. Are you going to take away knives then?" as if the people killing people with guns are just blood-thirsty.  The reality is, it's easy and impersonal to kill someone with the pull of a trigger.  It takes a lot more to get up on someone and stab them to death.  Plus there are statistics out there.  Other countries have actually taken away guns.  Australia's homicide rate fell by 59% and suicide rate fell by 65%.  Don't let the facts get in the way of your opinions.  My English friend calls it an "American problem".  He says if he got mad enough to kill someone, he wouldn't know how to get a gun.  Figuring it out would be an issue and then getting bullets would be another issue.  By then you're not in a murderous rage anymore and you're on to the next part of your life.

As the "leaders of the free world" we're always behind on the issues.  Common sense things can't get accomplished in our brand of democracy.  The problem could have something to do with the fact that the NRA made donations to 261 (236 Republican, 25 Democrat) candidates in 2012.  Would any of those candidates vote for more sensible gun control laws?  Is this how it should be?  The crazy racist guy killed nine people in a CHURCH not long ago and the conversation went to one about the Confederate Flag.  When in reality, if this mentally disturbed man had no access to guns, he would have just been a crazy racist guy flying a racist flag -which isn't good - but nine people would have returned home to their families.  Which goes back to the "protect your family" line.

If "protecting your family" is what you really care about, then you should want gun laws to change as well.  No guns = No gun deaths.  Sounds like a protected family to me.  I know this will fall on deaf ears and nothing will change.  Because of these current laws, these mass killings happen.  Because of these current laws, a 9 year old girl accidentally killed a range instructor with an uzi.  Because of these current laws, 2,439 people were shot in Chicago this year.  2,439! This isn't what the Second Amendment was written for.  It needs to be changed.  Laws need to be changed.  And the NRA's influence on Congress needs to go away.  Wake up, America.  You're embarrassing us.  Until next time...

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