Expat Jon takes on the world (well... Sweden)

Paternity leave is almost over.  This is my last week!  My how time flies.  It's bittersweet for me.  I love spending time with Bash.  I can't describe how important these three months have been.  I am ready to get back to work.  But it's also good for Bash to start his social life.  It's a new adventure for him.  A new era! Of course the day care system here is different.  In the US you have labor pains, push the baby out, wipe it off, smile at it, then drop it off at day care.  In Sweden it's a process.  They know you have parental leave, so you have to integrate the child into day care.  Of course you have to get into a line. It wouldn't be Sweden without a line.  Swedie was actually concerned that Bash wouldn't be accepted into day care on time.  We put him in the line when he was one week old.  How is that not enough time?  I actually ended up taking an extra two weeks of paternity leave once we...

Like probably just about everyone else, I just don't think about giving blood.  I know that it is a great thing to do.  I've heard that here in Stockholm there is a massive shortage of blood, so it is very important that people donate some of that good blood.  My past experiences with giving blood haven't been so good.  Throughout my time in the military I was "volunTOLD" to give blood.  I still felt good about myself afterwards (which is most important), but not as good as I would have felt if I took initiative and donated on my own free will. Then there's the process.  I'm not a big fan of needles.  Volunteering to give blood is also volunteering to have some nurse probe into my veins with a needle that grows in size as it gets closer to my arm.  I also happen to have blood that flows at the speed of maple syrup.  This means I just sit there with a foreign object in my arm for even longer than people that got there after me.  I cringe...

I finally did it!  I got up the nerve to get up on stage and try to make room full of strangers laugh (that are waiting to laugh).  The best part was... I didn't suck!  I had envisioned pretty much every possible disaster that could have happened.  I could freeze up and my mind go blank.  I could not get laughs at points where I expected to get laughs and then things get awkward and worse.  I could get booed off stage.  I could fall and seriously injure myself but everyone would think it's a part of the show and laugh at me while I writhe in pain.  I could say my five minute routine to a polite, but silent and generally unentertained crowd.  Or, I could kill it.  My jokes could get people to laugh. The cons definitely outweighed the pros heavily, yet somehow I mustered up the courage to do it.  I kind of stacked the deck in my favor by inviting a bunch of friends and family to support me on this crazy stunt.  I couldn't belie...

Tomorrow is the big day.  I've finally gotten the nerve to get up on stage and try to make people laugh.  I have always been able to make people laugh, but this is different.  The crowd will expect  to laugh.  They will want me to be funny.  And if I'm not, they won't laugh and it will be awkward for everybody in the room.  I will be failing in front of a bunch of people that paid to see me succeed.  Oh my goodness, I just got more nervous thinking about it! But I HAVE to do this.  I've flirted with the idea of trying stand-up for years, but I always chickened out.  I've heard about the incredible rush that you get when you "kill" and I want to experience that.  But I've also heard (and seen) the terrible horror that is bombing.  I've made my friends laugh hysterically and that is like a drug to me.  I can imagine the high I'll get from a room full of people laughing hysterically.  That's what drives me to go throug...